Appreciation is the grease that keeps relationships moving. Nothing is more powerful to convey the value of an individual. Genuine appreciation feeds the soul of the giver as well as the one who receives it. Many of the letters Paul writes starts with expressions of appreciation for example in Colossians he writes "We always thank God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, when we pray for you,” (Col1:3) Paul conveys his appreciation for the believers in Thessalonica, “How can we thank God enough for you in return for all the joy we have in the presence of our God because of you? (1Th 3:9). It is easy to overlook these as a simple greeting but the represented more. It was a great encouragement to the church knowing that Paul was thinking and praying for them.
Why is appreciation so lacking in many
relationships? I think it is rooted in the expectations we have of
others. Thoughts like “well its their job”, or “they are only
doing what they are supposed to do” It is so easy to let
expectations blind us to the opportunities to show people we value
them. I have made many friends in the service industries by going
out of my way to thank them for doing a good job. Think of the
people that serve us here at SCF. Ushers, greeters, coffee makers,
children's workers, communion preparers, people who come in early and
give of their time. Do you ever think to tell them you appreciate
them?
How does appreciation benefit the
giver?
For one thing it gets our minds of ourselves. It opens our
eyes to see the good in people. It is an antidote to pessimistic
thinking. When I pause and see someone giving of their time and
goodwill it challenges me to do likewise. When I express gratitude
it changes my perception, I begin to see the abundance of good in the
little things. I learn to love in a practical way when I really stop
and notice people. Dale Carnegie an American writer and
lecturer, believed that it is possible to change other people's
behavior by changing one's behavior toward them. He wrote “the
deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated
and the desire to be important.” Think about this in terms of your
own life, don't we all want to be noticed and valued? Doesn't you
heart soar a little when someone notices and comments on your
efforts? We have the power to lift people up. When we bless others
we are blessed in return. Pro 11:25 says it well “The one who
blesses others is abundantly blessed: those who help others are
helped.”
How does appreciation benefit the
receiver?
It tells us that we are noticed and we
are significant. So many times the encouragement that comes from
others reaffirms God's love for us. Proverbs paints a work picture
of the power of encouragement “A word fitly spoken is
like apples of gold in pictures of silver.”
(Pro 25:11) I remember when I was a young believer I was discouraged
and feeling insignificant. I lived in a Christian commune and had
the responsibility of milking 3 cows. I was a city boy and did not
like cows at all. I milked the cows and walked the 200 yards back to
the kitchen carrying 10 gals of milk in the rain feeling ready to
throw in the towel and leave and go back to the streets. We I
arrived there was a lady by the name of MaryLu Kelly that met me at
the door and spoke genuine words of appreciation, she told me how
much the milk meant to the single mothers and how Jesus loved the way
I served, she told me I was a man of God! It was life changing for
me. I still carry her encouragement in my heart after 45 years. You
and I have a powerful gift we can give, to notice people, to build
them up.