Freedom

My step mother used to say "life isn't fair" as she tried to help me as a troubled teen. At the time I hated those words and the premise that they held. I was the center of my world! In my mind it was all about me and the things that I had gone through. As a result my life spiraled out of control as I slipped deeper and deeper in to bitterness. Bitterness dictated my thought life and affected every area of my life. It was God who confronted my way of thinking that led to a change in my life.

All of us are challenged with the temptation to become embittered over something. In our American culture there is a deep seated sense of entitlement that is in many ways is unrealistic. I believe that it is a chief battleground in the heart of Christians. Hebrews 12:15 describes a bitter heart and how bitterness spreads as a cancer. Bitterness has been described as the child of resentment. It is the result of a real or imaginary injury played over and over again in the thoughts of a person. Bitterness is being constantly hurt by a memory and is holding onto a hurt until it has a grip on you and effects the way you respond to life. Bitterness is a frozen form of latent anger and resentment. Bitterness grows out of our refusal, to take responsibility to forgive when someone or something is taken from us. I have found that bitterness will manifest itself in the following ways.
• The harboring of animosity against a person or group of people whom the person feels has mistreated them.
• Unresolved anger over a negative event, which occurred in the past.
• Emotional turmoil felt whenever a certain person or event is discussed.
• The lack of forgiving, the inability to let go and forget.
• A root of distrust and suspicion manifests when dealing with people.
• Unresolved grief experienced when finding it difficult to accept a loss.
• A grudge held against a person or group of people whom the person feels has kept them from achieving anything.

All of the above point to a misunderstanding about the universe and our place in it. We are not the center! Our perspective is limited. As Christians we have the promise that God is involved in our life. He declares in Romans 8, that He works all things for our benefit. A little humility is called for if we are to escape the trap of bitterness. Jesus told us that we would face difficulties in relationships, that there would be misunderstandings. He said things like love your enemies, pray for those who use you! Jesus challenges us to think in a different way.

Luke 6:32-36
32 "If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' love those who love them. 33 And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' do that. 34 And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even 'sinners' lend to 'sinners,' expecting to be repaid in full. 35 But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. 36 Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful.
(from New International Version)

Jesus' words force us to consider that there is more at stake than the wrongs we have suffered and we must ask the question how do we change. Here are some of the ways that I have found helpful. First, Make a decision- consecrate your life to God. Realize and focus on what God has done for you. Rehearse His faithfulness in your life, set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. Then be ruthless when you see thinking patterns shaped by this world system. Actively sow a different way of thinking. Praise is a powerful antidote to negative ways of looking at life. Prayer is also a key to quieting the soul and gaining perspective. Prayer is where we make our needs known, and we can pour out our hurt and disappointments. Yet prayer is to flow from the place of thanksgiving, knowing that God is for you and has your best interest at heart. All of these things sow a different perspective and help us see the bigger picture.

On that eventful day in which Christ apprehended me He spoke deep in my heart that I was responsible for the outcomes in my life. Bad things had happened, but that ultimately it was that choices that I made, how I responded lead me to the place of crises that I was in. That day started a amazing journey that full of surprises.